What's the Common Denominator for SUCCESSFUL Businesswomen?

The Common Denominator is They Embrace Their Power…

Oprah calls it the “AHA Moment”. I call it the Jean Grey Effect. If you’re familiar with X-Men, you’ll understand in a moment. If not, just follow my flow.
Every woman’s journey to greatness starts somewhere. But the day she truly feels freedom, is when she steps into own her power.
It’s a point where you are so confident in your own skin, and confident about your company’s ability to deliver stellar results, that nothing anyone can say or do will fluster you. It’s knowing the greatness you possess AND knowing how to utilize it.
[bctt tweet=”#MogulChixChat Unleash Your Power, Unapologetically #WomenEntrepreneurs #FemaleFounders” username=”@talentdiva”]
I had a conversation with a young lady who wanted to expand her business. She is a real estate agent about to take her broker’s license exam. In her state, you must be a broker before you can go off on your own. She laid out to me her vision of dominating her niche. While her current broker, to whom she reports, has a lucrative niche, she feels that the company has the potential to be bigger in that niche by diversifying.
The broker said no. The young lady said that after numerous conversations, she saw the broker was not interested. So she decided to explore it herself. Immediately other realtors chided her and told her she was crazy, and how it was “safer” to stay under a broker..you know, less liability. And for a little while, she fell in line with that groupthink avoidance of power.
You can probably insert yourself into this story. Replace real estate agent with what you do. Our conversation is indicative of what a lot of us as full-blooded entrepreneurs go through at times. We create these paradigms and we box ourselves into them. So when we are ready to move on to something else or something bigger, other people and their fears hold us to the familiar. Then the doubt creeps in and we second guess ourselves, especially if things don’t look exactly the way we imagined they would as we set out on a different path.
Now to bring it back to my opening statement about Jean Grey. If you didn’t see the X-Men Apocalypse movie last year, Jean Grey is a level 5 mutant with these incredible powers. Now spoiler alert, we saw this in X-Men Last Stand a few years back. After Jean supposedly died in the second X-Men movie, in Last Stand they found her, or the essence of her dormant self, the Phoenix. She had these untapped powers that had until that point been under control. They would come out as a protective measure. But in this movie (Apocalypse, which is a prequel I guess), she was aware of her powers on a basic level but very guarded about using them. Jean wasn’t sure it was her right to use them and erred on the side of suppressing them to keep everyone safe.
In Apocalypse there’s a final battle scene where Professor X is being annihilated by the antagonist and he telepathically tells Jean to unleash her full power. He says “Jean, LET GO”. Until this point, she had been afraid of her powers, playing them down. But sensing the urgency to help, she has this moment where she let’s loose. Like, think of the time you got incredibly pissed off, not mad, but pissed off, and went off on someone. Well, imagine that times 1000.

Now before I continue, let me give some much needed props to my girl Storm. She was off in the corner afraid to jump into the fray. But she came through in the end.
Judge me if you want, but at that moment when Jean unleashed, I broke down into tears. Yes, me…in a movie theater…bawled…like a baby. I cried because it was symbolic for me. As a woman, as a person, as a businesswoman. I had been struggling with some things and wasn’t I could really do it. My mind was tripping. Who was I to do this? I didn’t have the “expertise” to go in this direction. I tried to do something else and was told I couldn’t do it so I left it alone and went in a different direction. Other people had failed, so I shouldn’t try it. I had other people also telling me this and pounding it into my head.
Not this time, sister! I tell my clients other people’s opinions of you are none of your business. As long as you’re following your path and doing right, don’t be concerned about background noise or chatter.
At that moment in the movie when Jean let go, I felt myself let go. When I got in the car, I started thinking and the passion welled up inside of me. I was at a stop light and I just told myself LET GO. I let out this primal scream. You know what? That shit felt AMAZING!! Try it today. I promise you, it is so cathartic! I KNOW my skills. I KNOW my resolve. I KNOW my resources. I’m a bad chick! So why should I hide my “power”? Needless to say, I ain’t doing that anymore.
Let me share my tips on coming into your power, and owning that shit!

My 3 Tips:

  • Own your power with confidence. You have more power than you know. Like Glenda the good witch told Dorothy (Wizard of Oz), “you’ve had the power inside you all along”. And so do you. You just needed someone to point it out and give you the nod to use it. What’s the use of going through all of the schooling, training, and experiences and not own your brilliance? You don’t have to wait for anyone to give you kudos or permission. Be proud of what you’ve accomplished, then show people how you take it the next level.
  • Learn the art of negotiating. The fabulous Barbara Corcoran of Shark Tank said on my show that you never back down from a bully (she beat Donald Trump) and you always negotiate from a position of strength. When you walk into a meeting, you must believe you will walk out with a deal, and that you are prepared to leave it on the table if you don’t believe it’s fair for both sides. Negotiating is a skill and a strength. Too many women concede or take crappy deals because we don’t believe we deserve it or because we believe that’s all we’ll get. Nope. When you walk into a real negotiation (and i don’t mean talking to low hanging fruit type clients, I mean the big money deals), the other side comes prepared with an opening offer and their firm offer. There’s always wiggle room there between the two. A seasoned negotiator knows this. If this isn’t a strength, take a class. There are plenty out there for women and people in general.
  • Get great at relationships. I cannot emphasize enough that relationships are power. Without getting into the preaching of networking, I have to say that you must be strategic in relationship building with the right people. It’s one thing to connect with random folks or people who reach out via social media. But as I said in the past, it’s not the quantity, but the quality of the people. There was a time when I would connect with most of the people who reach out just to be polite. But I had to learn quickly to vet people and dive deep into their intentions in forming a relationship with me, and how a relationship with them benefits me in the present or future. These days, I no longer connect to be nice or for the sake of reciprocating a follow. I’ve also taken my networking offline. I don’t continue with a new connection until after we’ve had an initial phone/Skype conversation and a face to face meeting. There’s power in that because I control my environment and give my time only to those with whom I can have a mutually beneficial relationship. And it gives us a chance to figure out how we can help each other. When building relationships, it important to ensure that you both can do something for one another. Otherwise, it’s wasted power.

What’s been holding you back from opening that new location? Introducing a new product line? Going after a new customer base? What is for YOU is for YOU. Don’t let fear or background noise steal your moment. Opportunities are plentiful, but the right opportunities have a small window to be acted upon. Don’t let fear paralyze you. Don’t compare yourself to others who are on different levels. I can’t remember who said it but I’ll say it to you. In the game of business, there are levels to this shit. It doesn’t mean you have to compromise on your principles and it doesn’t mean you have to fake it til you make it. What it means is you must constantly work on improving your skills and increasing your knowledge. That’s how you cultivate your power.
At the same time, you must build relationships and store up that social capital. You can’t go it alone, but you can position yourself to strike when the opportunities are hot. I don’t know about you, but five years from now when an opportunity I passed on is doing well, I don’t want to be on the outside with my face pressed up against the glass while others are on the inside celebrating without me me. Own your power. Embrace your power. Keep moving to the next level.
Let go, LET GO.
Til next time,
Adrienne Graham
Founder, Mogul Chix, LLC
[bctt tweet=”#MogulChixChat Unleash Your Power, Unapologetically #WomenEntrepreneurs #FemaleFounders” username=”@talentdiva”]
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Adrienne Graham is the Founder of Mogul Chix, LLC (www.mogulchix.com), a global company and community for female founders and women entrepreneurs. She works with female-founded companies to grow, scale & making them investment ready. She is CEO of Empower Me! Corporation, a growth strategies consultancy for high growth companies. She provides Strategic Business Growth advisory services to companies with high growth potential to assist clients in creating processes and strategies to effectively scale, run, grow and position their business for success. Adrienne is an author, serial entrepreneur and avid techie dedicated to promoting inclusive diversity in the tech, VC and startup community. She is steadily building her empire one company at a time. She is also a Mentor for the Straight Shot Accelerator in Omaha, NE, which helps guide startups into successfully launched ventures.

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